The Reason for the Season
“What do you want for Christmas?” It’s a simple question parents ask their kids. And when we do so, we have good intentions. However, if our goal is to raise selfless and grateful children, this gesture might do more harm than good.
When our children are young, shopping is easy. We find fun gifts to give – and our kids are happy to receive them. However, as our children get older, we run out of ideas and start asking, “What do you want?” Unfortunately, this one question not only shifts our focus, but our kid’s, as well.
Once we ask and they answer, on an unconscious level I believe kids begin to move from a place of “hoping for” to one of innocent and unconscious expectation. It’s one thing for a child to independently make a fun Santa wish list filled with gift hopes and dreams. It is another thing to ask for those exact items.
Additionally, when our kids tell us what they want, as good parents we run all over God’s creation to find those specifically requested (and at times, costly) gifts. I can’t speak for others, but some years I found myself moving from a place of joyous shopping to one of just box-checking.
As I sit here this morning, I’m wearing my “Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal” socks my oldest son gave to me many years back. I would have never bought them myself, but I love these quirky socks because they remind me of my son.
My recommendation? Keep gift-giving about the simple gesture and thought, and less about the specific extravagant gifts. Not only will this cut down on potential expectation and disappointment, but it will free up our ability to focus on what this holiday is really supposed to be about after all.
Have a blessed Christmas.